Part 10 - Talk to Me
"Hey, Mom," Rory said as she shut the front door. She sat down next to Lorelai on the couch, grabbing a handful of popcorn from the bowl in Lorelai's lap. She looked at the TV and smiled. "Mommy Dearest? Looking for inspiration?"
"Oh, my dear, dear child, she learned everything from watching me."
"Right because I often remember being beaten with wire hangers."
"Keep it up and we'll start."
"So how was your day?"
"Michel has outwardly declared his hatred for me, Sookie is still obsessing over the wedding and the eventful day for the Gilmore girls, which apparently people are still talking about, your grandmother called, she's not entirely thrilled with us and your Dad called."
"Oh, I missed Dad's call. I completely forgot about it. I can't believe I did that. I can't believe that I haven't talked to Grama since I got home."
"You have been otherwise detained."
"I know...I'm awful, aren't I?"
"Honey, you could never be awful. You're too busy being all in lo-"
"Don't go there, please," Rory said, cutting her mother off. "It's too late to call either one back. Were they angry?"
"Actually, your father called much earlier than he was supposed to. They had a doctor's appointment. And your grandmother is angry at me, not you. You're the golden child. They could never be mad at you."
"Well, I'll make it a point to call them both tomorrow."
"Your world isn't revolving around Jess tomorrow?"
"Funny lady. No, he has to study."
"Really?"
"Yeah, he has an important test on Friday."
"Speaking of Friday..."
"What?"
"I asked your grandmother if you could bring someone to dinner."
"You didn't!"
"I did, indeed."
"What did she say?"
"At first, nothing good but she came around so if you want to bring Jess on Friday, you can."
"Wow...why did you do that?"
"I thought you and Jess might shrivel up and die if you got twelve inches away from each other."
"Thanks, Mom, I'll talk to him about tomorrow."
"I'm hoping that the novelty of you being home wears off soon because I am being far too good."
"I'm enjoying it," Rory said, laughing.
"I bet. So how was your day?"
"Well, obviously, you know I went to Jess's at the crack of dawn, practically. I got freaked out over the book he gave me, which made me look like a complete nutcase, then we had breakfast with you, I came home, got a typical Paris phone call...and then Dean called."
"Uh-oh. How'd that go?"
"Well, he sounded so sad and I had all this guilt and so I went to see him at the market. Unfortunately, it turned into the same old thing. If he could talk to me without yelling at me, it would be a lot easier."
"I'm sorry, honey," Lorelai said, moving a piece of hair out of Rory's face.
"Then I went to Sarah's to find Jess but he went to the market..."
"Not good. What happened?"
"I don't really know. Apparently nothing. Jess isn't hurt or anything so I assume no fists were thrown, which is a relief."
"And what about Dean? Is he hurt?"
"I, uh, don't know. I didn't go to check on Dean."
"Oh."
"Oh? What's that mean? It's an extremely loaded oh."
"You did date him for a year, Rory. You don't care if anything happens to him now? That's not like you."
"I thought Jess being fine was a good indication that nothing had happened. Besides, I'm sure Dean is alright. He seemed more interested in yelling at me than talking to me."
"He's only worried about you."
"No, Mom, he's not. He doesn't like that he lost because for some twisted reason he sees it as a contest between him and Jess."
"With good reason, hon."
"Mom, you weren't jumping for joy when Dean and I first started dating. Now you act like he was the perfect boyfriend."
"At least Dean treated people with respect," Lorelai said, feeling herself getting angry and trying hard not to be.
"Okay, so he was nicer to other people, which Jess is working on. But he wasn't always nice to me or treated me with respect."
"Dean loved you honey. He didn't want you to-"
"Get hurt by Jess. Yeah, I got that before. No one seemed concerned if Dean would hurt me."
"Of course we were, honey. But Jess has history here. He has issues that I don't know if you can handle."
"What about Dean's issues? What about him yelling at me if he didn't get his way? Or even better, breaking up with me because I was going to Washington and he didn't want me to?" Rory stood up, her face burning with anger. "Yes, Jess has issues but at least he doesn't take them out on me. He doesn't yell, he doesn't get angry with me if he doesn't get his way. And I love how you are Dean's biggest advocate!" Rory stormed out of the room and slammed the door. Lorelai could feel it right to the center of her heart.
*****************
Jess walked into the diner, took off his jacket, and grabbed a wet rag from the back. He cleaned the counters, tables and put the chairs up. He went behind the counter and pulled the sugars and ketchups out, preparing to fill them.
"Hey, thanks" he heard Luke say. "I wasn't expecting to see you."
"Sorry about that."
"It's fine. You have a valid reason to not be here this week." Luke starting filling the sugars while Jess worked on the ketchup. "So you think you're getting there? You'll do okay on Friday?"
"Yeah, it should be fine."
"Good, that's good." Luke began fidgeting with the sugar. "So, your mom called today."
"Joy. What did she want?"
"To say hi, I guess. And, uh, well, I told her that Sarah was here."
"Why did you do that?" Jess asked angrily.
"I didn't think it was a secret. I thought they got along seeing as she babysat you for so long."
"You should know better than anyone else that she doesn't get along with anyone. Did you tell her about the test, too?"
"No, you said you didn't want anyone to know so, no. You didn't say the same about Sarah."
"My mother actually told Sarah she didn't need her services anymore after only a couple of years."
"But she stuck around?"
"Yeah...whenever a new babysitter came, Sarah would talk them into letting her take me and she would bring me back before mom got home."
"So she watched you all those years and was never paid for it?"
"No, I guess not. Maybe she just got used to having me around."
"I understand," Luke said under his breath but Jess heard him. He smiled briefly and shook his head as he sometimes did when people surprised him. "You nervous about the test?"
"Not so much."
"I'd be going out of my mind if it were me. That kind of pressure...I don't like that."
Jess made a noise in agreement and started wiping off the ketchup bottles and putting them away.
"You don't have to answer this because I know you have this whole monosyllabic, grunting thing that you do, but I have a question."
"Okay..."
"This change of heart about school...is it because of Rory? Or is this actually something you want to do? I'd hate to see you go through all this and then if that doesn't work out...you give up on it."
"You think it won't work out?" The question was out of Jess's mouth before he realized it. He didn't want to talk about Rory with Luke. He didn't even want to talk about school with Luke. It wasn't that he didn't think he could but that would bring a whole new dynamic into their current relationship and Jess didn't normally trust anyone enough to talk about these sorts of things.
"No, no, I didn't mean anything like that," Luke stammered. "I think it's great that you and Rory are...whatever it is that you are...but I just am wondering if things, by chance, don't work, would you pull what you used to in school?"
Jess took a deep breath and quickly said, "I'm doing it for myself, but I can't say it didn't start because of her, okay?"
"Okay." Luke smiled as he wiped the spilt sugar off the counter. "Well, then I guess it's a good thing those baseballs miraculously reappeared."
"Yeah, it is," Jess said, smiling slightly.
"Although, I have to say, I would have liked to have seen one of those games being played with the tennis balls."
***********************
"Rory?" Lorelai knocked on her door lightly. "Rory, you awake?"
"Yeah, come in," Rory called from inside her room.
Lorelai opened the door and saw Rory lying on her bed, reading, which did not surprise her. Lorelai sat on the bottom of the bed and rested her hands on her knees. She didn't know why she felt so nervous. It wasn't like they had never fought before, let alone fought about Jess. It was different now. Before he was her friend, now he was her...well, Lorelai didn't know what they were exactly...but he was definitely more than her friend.
"You calm down?" Lorelai asked.
"Have you?" Rory retorted.
"I'm trying here, Rory. Cut me a little slack, okay? I could be forced to say some things that I don't want to because I'm here trying to set things right."
"If you have something to say, say it. I won't stop you."
"Your brittle attitude might."
Rory put her book down and scooted up on her bed so that her back was against the headboard. She put her knees up to her chest and watched her mother, who kept shifting her position, not getting comfortable no matter what she tried.
"I'm not really sure what to do here, Rory. I'm trying with Jess. I even scored an invite to your grandparents because I thought it would be something you'd want to do. The things I said about Dean...it wasn't my intention to make you feel badly about it. I don't know everything about your relationship with him, I guess. I thought things were good between you."
"They weren't horrible but they weren't fantastic all the time."
"Okay, so you've made a choice with Jess and so I will accept that and leave the Dean thing alone. I wasn't trying to push him back into your life but I was surprised that you seemingly didn't care if anything happened to him."
"It's not that I don't care, Mom. I was more worried about Jess. I don't think Dean's a bad guy but things weren't working. I tried to make it work but it became more difficult the more jealous he got. And then..." Rory didn't continue.
"And then Jess? Honey, it's okay if you started to have feelings for him. You're only seventeen. You weren't betrothed to Dean."
"But everyone acts like I was. You act like I was."
"I thought I was being the good mom, you know? Being friends with your boyfriend, integrating him into our little world...And you were so serious about him and you kept insisting that everything was fine, even after you went to New York."
"I think I...Nevermind. It's not important."
"Of course it is," Lorelai urged. "Maybe this is something you've been wanting to say. And I want you to talk to me, Rory. I don't want you to think that you can't."
"I was scared." Rory looked quickly at her mother. "I didn't want to lose Dean forever. I thought that because he was my first boyfriend I owed him something. Or that I was supposed to stay with him because that's what I was supposed to do. And Jess...he...he made me feel something completely different."
"Did I make you feel like you were supposed to be with Dean forever?"
"You didn't make it any easier."
"Oh, babe, I never meant to do that. All I want is for you to be happy."
"I know that."
"I want you to answer me one more question about Dean and then I'll leave it be, okay? And it's kind of a round-a-bout Dean question..."
"Uh-huh."
"You're sudden decision to go to Washington...did that have anything to do with Jess coming back or was it all Dean being angry about the possibility of you going?"
"A little of both. I don't think I realized how much I needed to go until I saw Jess."
"When did you see him?"
"At the wedding...he showed up at the Inn. I kissed him...I didn't even know I did it at first. I was just so happy to see him that I...I kissed him."
"Did you tell Dean that?"
"Today I did. I had to. I knew it would make him angry and hurt him but I had to tell him..."
"Did you and Jess discuss the whole being a couple factor before you came home? Because the two of you are acting like you've been dating for years."
"I thought you were only going to ask one more question."
"One more Dean question. Don't you know I'm sneaky like that?"
"Right...gullible me." Rory picked up her book again, mindlessly fanning the pages. "We were friends anyway but going to D.C. and having only the phone and letters...our friendship grew, I guess. And it wasn't intentional...the way things are going...it's not what we planned to do. We were just going to be friends...see what happened."
"So what changed that?"
"Seeing him Sunday afternoon. I made the decision to forgo the entire friendship thing and-"
"Just get to the kissing thing?"
Rory laughed out of embarrassment. "Yeah, I suppose so."
"And you're happy?"
"Yes, Mom, very happy."
"Well, then I'm happy, too."
"Third degree over?"
"Yes, it's over. Not too painful, I hope."
"I'm waiting for Friday for that." They both smiled and they both felt better getting what they needed to off their minds. Lorelai was delighted that Rory had finally talked to her and Rory was grateful that she had her mother to talk to.